Most of us can’t stand to see an animal suffer or in pain. In the movies we would rather see the cowboy gunned down in his saddle than to see his horse shot and killed. Some of the most heartbreaking movies and books tell the story of the death and suffering of animals, such as Old Yeller, Where the Red Fern Grows, The Fox and the Hound, Bambi, Marley and Me, Charlotte's Web, and my favorite but not very known, Togo, the list goes on and on. In fact, I am sure as you hear or read this, you want to add to my collection of animal tragedies and sorrows. It would include your very own list of books, stories or movies that are seared into your heart, the ones with animals that bring sadness and puddling of tears in the corners of your eyes when you remember them. Most animals have truer and purer souls than most people.
It is also impossible to forget that pivotal moment when as a child or even as an adult when you lose your animal best friend. Sometimes that death comes in the form of a treacherous decision of having to put him or her to sleep. Death can never be explained to a child; death can never be understood even as an adult but is felt at every age. That moment usually happens when the animal has been injured, suffering from disease or has just got old. The heartache and pain of seeing a helpless living animal suffering is too much to see, too much to hear and can be felt in our very own human soul. So out of compassion, empathy and great love, we are deliberately and with full acknowledgement that our actions will kill, will end the life of one of God’s creations; choose euthanasia.
Euthanasia in the simplest meaning of the word is not often associated with the death or killing of a person. But what if it was? Metaphorically, what if the person didn’t even know their life was being euthanized? Let’s metaphorically apply euthanasia to a person’s life. What happens if that metaphorical euthanasia falls? What happens if it is only semi-successful? What happens when it is nefarious and unspeakable in nature? What happens when it is painful and very slow? I was born a Kentucky Wildcat in 1974 and there was an attempted euthanasia of my life.
There are many ways to kill a person. I am not talking about ways to die like that TV show, and I am not just talking about physically dying either. I am talking in the metaphorical sense, but it is tangible, nonetheless. You can kill the spirit of a person, take away the will to live, use up hope, wipe out the past, destroy the future, torture love, bury kindness, punish happiness, warp a personality, disrupt mentality, break family connections, steal a smile, annihilate self-worth, and mangle the feelings of just being human, you can kill all of those things in a person.
Then there is the physical and definitive killing of a person. The law has many ways to define the latter, murder, indifference to human life, homicide, all those terms plus many more. To take another person’s life is not their choice and is more like cruel senseless euthanasia. A killing makes headline news and makes for eager gossip in the South. A killing is usually followed by “bless their heart, we should pray for (insert the person’s name, friends and family)”.
Kill - verb, kha-e-ll, the act of cruel senseless euthanasia. Now used in a sentence; The violent abusive man attempted to euthanize the woman by strangling, kicking, leaving her to die, beating her and then destroying her family connections, reputation, mentally health along with everything she loved and held dear. He even left the family cat, Wheezy, she loved to die.
Would you trust someone who could watch, listen to and could do something but chooses to do nothing for an injured dying dog crawling in the street, whimpering, bleeding, scared and begging for help. What kind of person could show no mercy to the wounded and dying dog? What if that wounded and dying dog was their own family pet? Imagine that dog crawling into its owner's yard for help, in so much pain, unable to stand and eyes full of fear. Then you watch the owner step right over the dying, begging, crying dog and into the house. Left to suffer, left to bleed, left in fear, left to die, just left. Let that scene play out in your head. Would you then invite that person into your home, your life, and to be around your pets or your children?
I lived that scene, I begged for my life, I dragged myself into my yard trying to get help, I cried out to the man who was supposed to love me most in life, I cried out to his mother. Both of them for 33 years told me they loved me and cared for me. My body was stepped right over and left bleeding. One hour and 28 minutes I laid dying. For those of you who are just listening or reading my 128 Podcast and 128 Blog for the first time - now you know where I got the title.
I am often asked about “what happened to Yard?”, my ex-husband. He was just recently indicted by a grand jury and arraigned. This October it will be two years since the day of his arrest. His mother has brain cancer. It is hard to pray for someone who left you to die but with God's love I can do that now. Vengeance is God's and justice be done on Earth. Yard's trial is forthcoming. I went to court to see him be arraigned. I saw the woman whom he was with while we were still married there to support him (she was also one of my best friends). I pray for her and her children too. I still love them all. Yes, I still love them all. Just because you miss or still love someone after such heartache, betrayal and pain; does not mean that you want that relationship back. It does not mean that you even want it repaired. Foremove, it doesn't mean you still want some kind of connection. What does it mean then? Well, praying for someone, missing someone and still loving someone who also betrayed and hurt you, well it just means you are human, it means you are a person who can forgive and your love for them was true and your love for them is real.
The wheels of justice may move slowly, but they do move. For any victim or survivor who doubts that justice will be served, do not give up, do not lose hope. You are not alone, tomorrow needs you and your truth deserves to be heard.
I am about to tell you about a young man who reached out to me after hearing my introduction video for this 128 Podcast via our social media platform Instagram. I have never included another person’s story in my 128 Podcast or 128 Blog. I asked him if I could quote what he messaged me and I can tell he had some good home training because he responded, “yes ma’am.” I cried after reading about the love he had for his furry best friend and loss of a little piece of his heart when Peanut Butter passed away. Here are Kavan’s words “Peanut Butter was something else, he was really a brother to me. We like to imagine these furry bundles of joy last forever but then we have to face that their time is limited like everything else. We just see them go faster. It is both a blessing and a curse to be able to spend their whole life with them. We’re all they know. I hope one day we can reunite with them. Peanut is likely sleeping up there like he did down here and that’s OK, I’ll wake up when I get there just like I did down here.” Kavan, I often find it is very easy to describe pain, suffering and hate but I struggle to describe love, hope and meaning for experiences and emotions. But today I used your words to find meaning, hope and unconditional love. Thank you Kavan and I have no doubt that Peanut Butter sleeps on clouds in Heaven.
There are moments when I doubt if I have the momentum to “put my business out on the street” and if I am doing what God’s plan is for me. I could not save my family, I could not save my marriage, I could not save myself from the abuse, I could not save my sons from the horrible truth, I could not save my friends and family from the pain or embarrassment that followed after that 1 hour and 28 minutes. There will be questions that I can never answer but I know if I can help one woman survive the abuse and violence, she feels she is imprisoned in or curve senseless gun violence then that is generational change. And generational change is beautiful. Generational change is powerful. There will be another 128 Blog and 128 Podcast where I will tell ya'll about those people who did save me, those who had been in my life for decades, and the new people who became family along my journey. I can't wait to introduce you to my new fur-iends who helped save my life and their humans who are now part of in my new life.
I would like to take a moment and express my admiration, love and prayers for our military and their families. A special shot out to Ibis the Kitten’s dad, who is in the Coast Guard off Tybee Island, Ga. Ibis, I just met your human mom today and she told me all about your dad, you sure are loved Ibis. In addition, my paternal Great Aunt passed away just before my 128 Podcast, she was a mighty woman for God, she loved deep, laughed often and I know she is hugging and kissing her nephew, my dad up in their heavenly forever home. Both my aunt and my dad had personalities that left tattoos of love - it was permanent. They loved animals- pure and simple. My dad always had a dog somewhere on the farm in Kentucky, and every dog was named Toby. My Dad loved his goats, the cows, the hogs, the horses and our two mean as the day is long and most hateful roosters - Boss Hog and Rosco P. Coltrane.
In Memory of Peanut Butter, my Dad, and my Aunt and in honor of Ibis - please consider supporting Purnia’s Purple Pet Leash Project- helping to provide safe places and domestic violence shelters for pets because pets can be victims too.
I am Tiffany Elizabeth Tipton, founder of Tiffany’s 128 Initiative -Justice, Advocacy and Guidance for victims and survivors of domestic/family and gun violence. For more information and resources go to www.tiffanys128initiative.com
Stay Alert, Stay Informed, Stay Safe and Stay Rooted In Love - Tiffany Elizabeth Tipton
All of Tiffany's 128 Blog are in her own words and no portion is AI generated - please leave a comment below
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